The mri and ct scan came back yesterday. My cervical and thoracic spine have “multiple hemangiomas”. These are typically benign vascular tumors. Now I am waiting for my appointment with orthopedics to find out what we can do about it. Lots of waiting these days. Still no relief from the numbness in my back.
From what I am reading these can become large enough to cause compression fractures but can be shrunken using radiation. I really have to find out more when I talk to the doctor but the good news is that my oncologist isn’t concerned about a cancer of any kind at this point. Radiology recommended a follow up ct scan in June to see if there are any changes on a nodule that showed up in my lung (which honestly may be absolutely nothing).
The training has begun! I am walking an average of 3.5 miles a day to prepare for the Avon Walk that I will be doing in just 6 months. The fall foliage and cooler days makes this an enjoyable activity and I also frequent the gym for additional weight lifting and endurance work outs. I held a fund raising event at the breast care center at Walter Reed Army Medical Center last week and raised 8% of my goal by selling my jewelry creations. So far I am at nearly 30% raised so I continue pressing on with those efforts a little bit every day. Thank you to all who have donated so far! My Avon Walk page can be viewed HERE.
This week my MRI results came back all clear so that was good news! I must admit I held my breath for those 8 days waiting for results. I am told that this feeling of dread lasts a long time, at least until the ten-year survival point. Even then, with no cure for breast cancer, the fear of recurrence looms all the time. The MRSA infection in my arm continues to heal well and is down to a dime-sized scab with some scarring.
In the meantime I celebrate LIFE and help those newly diagnosed whom I meet, which seems to be nearly every week. The numbers of women affected by this disease never ceases to amaze me. Giving them hope and support gives me a reason to continue fighting for a cure.
I love this song. I have heard it many times over the course of my storm called cancer and am well aware that sometimes God doesn’t take away the storms in my life. But I have felt Him calm me within. I am at that place now. A calm place. Sure, the dangers that lurk in this sea of my life hover beneath me all the time, but I have felt carried through this years’ storms and I know that come what may, He will carry me through those too. Please visit Reduce Your Risk pages to learn more about breast cancer risks.
My husband and I met with the surgeon on Monday. I am scheduled for surgery next week, September 25 for removal of the mass, which is the size of a large olive. This procedure is an excisional biopsy since they are not totally sure the make up of this tumor. In fact the diagnosis officially listed on my pathology report says “FA? vs. cancer”, meaning questionable fibroadenoma vs. cancer. That’s not terribly comforting, yet statistically the numbers are in my favor that it is benign. I hold onto that but still have nervous stomach aches and sleepless nights. I finally told my youngest son (17) and he was visably upset with the news but I reassured him that this is probably nothing. Another waiting game ahead…
Six more days until the biopsy. This must be the worst part. The not knowing…the worrying. I feel shooting sensations in my breast. I have had them for the past several months but sort of ignored it and figured they would tell me at my annual if I needed to worry about that. It’s a constant reminder of what’s to come, although, even that I don’t really know what to expect WILL come. I think about all sort sof things. I think about what I will say if they tell me its benign. I think of what I’ll do if they tell me it’s not. I think of what I’ll tell my children and I think of what my breast will look like if they have to operate on it in any way. I think to myself that it is all very strange that I decided in April that I would not return to work this fall and, everyone seemed so puzzled as to why I would do that! After all, I loved my job! I wanted to stay home full time and build my business and clean my house, I told myself. And really, it was the truth! But now I wonder if God has something else in the works for me and He was opening my schedule to make room for it. I could let my mind get carried away with this thing and I am trying really hard not to. My gynecologist called last week so I could talk to her about my test results and she seemed very guarded in her answers and said that this shouild feinately be explored. She also said (twice) “You’ll be in my prayers”. Why would she say that? I found it very odd. Did she read something ominous in the report? I wish knew for sure. Well on a lighter note, isn’t this butterfly pretty? I took this photo this Labor Day weekend when my husband and I went away for the night and stopped by an orchard on our way home from Pennsylvania. It could be published in National Geographic, don’t ya think? This is a hobby I have long wanted to explore, photography, and with the purchase of a new fancy camera I am on my way!