I haven’t posted in a few days. It’s been a long week, well, actually more than a week now, since my last chemo treatment. Today is the 9th day and I am still very weak. The doctor warned us these infusions would be cumulative, meaning, they add up and go longer, deeper, wider, heavier than the previous – and he was right.
The nausea and back ache have been continuous, managed by medications (which make me very draggy so my doctor is putting me in for a different type which I can pick up today) , but this extreme fatiuged feeling – there is no pill for, but “time”. Passing the time. And this week, that’s been lots of time. The backache, I am told, is caused by bone marrow trying to rebuild blood cells and platelets, which are promoted by the shot I receive at home after each treatment. If not given this shot, my cell counts could drop too low and I could be at risk for infection or not be strong enough for the next dose of chemo. So…I get the lesser of two evils – lucky me! I am having pain in my right rib cage which the doctor will have x-rayed when I am there Wednesday. It feels bruised, sore to the touch. No, I haven’t been having any boxing sessions lately!
In the meantime I watch my world go on all around me and try to step into it, but soon have to give up. It is a defeating feeling. I have always been much a Do-er. Last night I was so tired at 9 o’clock, managed to stay up until nearly 10, and Tim said “Why are you so tired?” I had to laugh and say, “Well, I drove to the post office,, dropped my mail in the slot, I ate lunch and sat at a table and all of that just about did me in!” Just that little effort took it outa me! Nevermind all of the other things that need to be done and have to wait! Fortunately it is now the weekend and we can all play catch up at home.
Kelli woke us in the middle of the night with the flu. She is home sick from school now and I am keeping my distance. I can’t afford to get the flu on top of everyting else. Tomorrow night is a benefit concert at her school for one of her fellow students injured in a tragic car accident last month. Kelli is part of a singing quartet and does NOT want to miss it. She keeps asking if she’ll be well enough to perform. I hope so! Prayers are appreciated!
I awaken today with the sun shining – a nice site to see during a gloomy winter season! This sunset photo (above) was taken by my cousin in California -thanks Janelle! It is a beautiful reminder to me that the sun comes back every day. Even after a dark night. I’m grateful we can count on at least that!
…Weeping may endure for a night,
but Joy Comes in The Morning.
My Life Is In Your Hands – VIDEO HERE or click arrow in the photo below